Wednesday, June 18, 2014

when the plan backfires

Moving on from this guy feels a lot like it were as if we had actually broken up. The first week was somewhat a relief to not have to see him all the time. The second week... well, that one was more like that longest week after a breakup where you cant stop thinking about him. "Is he thinking of me?" "Does he miss me?" "Is he already talking to someone else?". Lots of questions to remain  unanswered. I stayed in contact with him through text but even that has gone fizzled out. And now I'm at a point where the temptation is gone, and the thought of him has almost disappeared for good.

That is until...a mutual friend invited us to hookah tomorrow night >.<

and being the idiot I am , I accepted.

WHYYYYYYYYYY

ugh you'd think I would know better by now.. I don't know what it was that made me say yes. The thought of just him and another girl? The thought of seeing him again? I don't know but it was a classic situation where I would've told anyone to say no, meanwhile I had just done it myself. and now my stomach feels like a tight knot is forming in the dead center of it and all of a sudden my hair is too plain and my face has been out in the sun too long and it seems like I gained weight since I last saw him. great.

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